CULTURE

Last night I heard something on NPR that mirrored something else I heard a few weeks ago. An African man (country unspecified) was commenting about a previous segment on NPR in which author and activist, Michael Eric Dyson had said something to the effect of unfair high school testing situations in Florida. Now, since I didn't hear the original show I can't provide a whole lot of information about what district, tests, student body etc were being discussed. But the African man's comment struck me. He said, and I'm paraphrasing here, that the problem with the American education system is that we Americans focus too much on making children happy and comfortable. School is about academia, not about social interaction and wellness. We spend too much time adjusting these exams to fit the needs of the children; adjusting the school curriculum to fit the needs of the children; too much time developing sports and "good feeling" programs instead of focusing on the academics.

A week ago, an old co-worker and I ran into each other and got to talking about our kids. She has 3 children, two girls and a boy. She's Black American and married to an African physician. Her husband studied at an Ivy League school and is, I suppose by their definition, doing well for himself. She just pulled her oldest girl (kindergarten) out of a small Catholic school and enrolled her into, what is considered here, an "Ivy League" private school. It's considered "Ivy" because it costs about $15,000 a year. Mind you, the kid (and her other daughter) are going into first grade and kindergarten, respectively. It's predominately white, save for a few upscale Blacks here who can afford that kind of tuition. Personally, I don't think it takes $15,000 a year to educate a child, but hey that's me and that's a conversation for another day.

So anyway, her husband's take on the matter is: "School is not for socializing. School is where you go for education. Period. That's what's wrong with Americans (especially Black Americans), he says. You all worry about socializing too much when there are people who would give their right arm to have the choices you have here."

Well.

While I'd like to agree with the first comment about the standards being changed every time the wind blows too hard, I have to grossly disagree with the latter. School *IS* about socialization and it's also about education. What's sad about the matter is that this generation of parents today seem to have this whole thing mixed the hell up to the major detriment of the children. This generation is so achievement oriented that we are robbing the children of exactly what they need in order to achieve and be productive citizens in the first place. Parents are shuffling their kids from one activity to the next these days. Children don't play outside anymore, you have to call and make a "play date" or meet up at a "toddler gym." Children don't stay at the same school until they graduate, their parents are always in search of the elusive utopia --- the best school their taxed money can buy. The minute the teachers tell the parents their "walk-on-water" child has a problem, it's off to the races to find a New School. A Better School. Because something has *GOT* to be wrong with the old one.

Knowing how to get along with others, to respect differences, to make friends and be a friend is fundamental to human development. It's fundamental to success. How do you think Oprah became "Oprah?" and "Oxygen" and "O" Magazine? By just studying from sun up to sun down? No. Oprah has mastered the ability to empathize, to listen, to understand the plights of people. Same with Bill Gates. Bill Gates gives more money to the African people than any man on the planet. He is under no obligation whatsoever to give one dime to anyone. He gives more money to African countries than Bob Johnson who owns BET ... now what's up with that?
What I'm saying is, before I digress, is that a child's education and future well being has more to do with socialization than it does academics. Heck, a monkey can memorize times tables but can the same monkey lead a billion dollar enterprise? Can the same monkey sit down with the family of a dying patient and explain what's happening in terms that they can understand and deal with?

It's about striking balance. Each has it's place. Rob a child of the opportunity to socialize with their peers (peers that look like them as well as those who don't) and I swear you've got the next Jeffrey Dahmer, John Malveaux on your hands. I've worked with enough brilliant yet socially retarded physicians to last me a lifetime. Physicians who ought to have their licenses burned and fed to the hogs; whose bedside manners suck. Not to mention managers who couldn't lead a horse to a trough of water. You know what I'm saying.

So once again, on yet another rainy day, my heart grieves for the children.

Be well. Be Love(d).

ANGEL